After numerous months of pandemic dietary “modifications” (dawn to dusk bored eating/creative use of household pantry items ignored for years/Skip, Uber, DoorDash, BringMeGrub), it would appear my digestive system has begun to recoil against a lack of self-control and/or vegetables.
When it comes to my nutritional well-being, I often find it difficult to make the proper decision when faced with “tasty” versus “bland but healthy” options. Take fibre for example. The apparent health benefits of added fibre in your diet are manifold, yet often I feel like a horse with a sweet tooth licking at a feedbag filled with rolled oats and wheat shavings when I consider adding any of it to my meals. I am like that poor deprived horse, entirely unenthused.
My lack of enthusiasm, in part at least, might be related to how fibre is described – such as from this brief Wikipedia excerpt:
“Fiber, also spelled fibre, is a class of materials that are continuous filaments or are in discrete elongated pieces, similar to lengths of thread. They can be spun into filaments, string or rope, used as a component of composite materials, or matted into sheets to make products such as paper or felt.”
Yummy! Move over Rocky Road ice cream, I want a hardy bowlful of Continuous Filament Felt Shavings! Can I get some discrete elongated sprinkles on that, please?
Never mind that it takes me an eternity to chew through a meal that contains minute traces of fibre, my experience over the years is that foods comprised of, or containing fibre are most often dull as a tinfoil drill bit. However, I am pleased to report that this longstanding belief of mine has recently (and mercifully) changed.
Watching TV one lazy Saturday morning, I happened to catch a commercial that has given me new hope when it comes to successfully adding fibre to my diet. It turns out that both Froot Loops and Corn Pops are now considered a legitimate source of fibre. In the case of Froot Loops, they are also a notable source of “froot” and may contain your suggested daily dose of the colour purple.
Yes, Froot Loops alone claims to contain two whopping grams of fibre, and if that weren’t convincing enough to win over newfound fibre fans, the cereal box also proclaims that the product is a “source of seven essential nutrients”. I don’t think that there’s any further explanation of just what nutrients those might be, but I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest that they HAVE to be nutritional nutrients.
Farewell, salads! Arrivederci, apples! Hit the road, hay and bran – I’ve got myself a new friend with fibre, a friend that can be consumed in a bowl of milk, or hand-picked and gobbled dry straight out of the box – it is indeed a versatile food product. To quote the cereal box catchphrase, it “Makes Fibre Fun!” Indeed…
Now, I know what you’re thinking, especially if you’re a nutritionist or dietician. A man can’t subsist solely on cereal. True. But if Froot Loops and Corn Pops can offer new hope in the quest for added fibre in my diet, isn’t it possible that other products might do the same? Carrot cake sounds awfully healthy. Maybe I can find some bran bon-bons? Can it be possible that those Fruit & Nut candy bars just might be the ultimate combination of fibre and nutritional nutrients? Bears might forage in the wild for them?
I’ll do some field research and get back to you.
Humour columnist and author Dan St. Yves was licensed with Royal LePage Kelowna for 11 years. Check out his website at danstyves.com.
